Look Alive

09 February 2011

The Spouses of Our Youth

Who are these husbands and wives of our youth that the Bible mentions to illustrate pleasant and painful truths about us?

Some readers are happily married, others are divorced and still others haven't experienced union or separation -- with no plans to, in some cases. Of course, many of these same people's thinking only accounts for rings, blood tests, state-filed certificates and ceremony when it comes to the big M. The early understandings that "knowing", "[going] in unto" or otherwise "[laying] with" another constituted marriage don't seem to make it to the modern mindset at all.

Considering this angle, have you been married before? Is the person you're married to now your first husband or wife? Although their standards are arguably aligned with the world's, can we honestly scoff at serial wives Liz Taylor, Zsa Zsa Gabor or even J-Lo after all? Should those men at the well have even thought of stones except to kick them while walking away? Well, if we're living according to the Word, yes -- but taking that opportunity would only hurt us both, as witnessing another coming to, and ourselves growing in, the Truth provides the gratification we sought.

I return to the question, then, if only for myself: who are the spouses of our youth? If you need to search for the answer, try not to mind what it sounds like... despised of our youth or the spies of our youth! It could be the first boy or girl you thought or spoke of 'getting heavy' with. Maybe its the one who made you feel so light, you went 'all the way'. If you weren't both virgins at the time, were you then married to different people? Does that make someone a consensual second away from their virginity an adulterer?

Adultery, defined as voluntary sexual intercourse by a married person with someone other than the spouse, might be considered a big and bitter pill to swallow, especially in the case of that young or, however rare, older virgin. We are called to honor our bodies as living temples for the Living God, so in this sense, joining outside of Him or His will can be unfortunate. (gulp)

These might seem like childish questions, but we'd be surprised to know how many believers date even multiple partners with sexual involvement while pursuing (as opposed to awaiting or otherwise preparing for) spouses in their adulthood. Trust, once I thought or knew to pray even on matters like these, I remember wishing Poland Spring bottled Holy water a little while back. Instinct kicked in and I stood in the mirror praying hard for revelatory intervention instead. The flesh can pose real challenges to our faith if we allow it. Thankfully, as 1 Corinthians 10:13 teaches, God is more faithful and His Way more enduring than any temptation.

Now, if sexuality and the beauty of human form were condemned, the Song of Solomon and all the pre-baguette "begets" of antiquity wouldn't exist! What the Lord states as His desire, however, is that our waters of Life be shared selectively and in sacred trust with one partner, not with some stranger or even familiar person of great physical attraction. This is mandated for the elimination of strife and the outcome of Godly children. Maintaining the seed is also essential for vitality according to the wisdom of Eastern medicine.

For those the Lord does not bless with physical offspring, I believe that children can also represent creative endeavors, joyful outlets or even those in need who you can provide a home of Love and wisdom for. All we do as singles or couples can and should also edify the Most High.

So who are these people already? The first people outside of our families that we associated love with? The ones we were arranged for by tradition? The ones who proposed but we didn't know to receive? All the rhetoric in the world  (or at least in this post) might hold the answers for some people. For Eve, the husband of her literal youth was Adam. The same is true with Sarai and Abraham.

In this day and age, how is this first love scenario possible for the rest of us? Is there Godly hope for me as a single? Truth is, all the people in the world were first joined to One who affirmed the question of our lives before and after our attachment to the womb. No matter our age, when we truly invite and accept Him as the Head of our lives, we are redeemed from our missteps and abandoned missions then reborn into new Life. The added benefit is knowing what we wished we knew once led to the partner of our earthly covenant. Whew!

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